well its been a while since my last mail but theres plenty happening on the
sun drenched island of gran canaria.

Firstly in many bars in which i have spent a great deal of time researching
the drinks and the floor i still see lots of d.c´s stickers
on the dj boxes, on the bars and in the toilets. these stickers can also be
seen on many hotel doors and receptions and worringly on the doors of a
doctors clinic.

Anyway on to the good stuff:

i took a day off and went on the booze cruise where i got hammered and got
chatting to a few girls and then for no reason (except i asked them for a
threesome) i had one sitting on my face one straddling me and one kissing
her mate!! fucking yee hah!! however the best eas yet to come literally..
one girl who had sat on my face put her hand in my shorts and started
tossing me off, now me being into equality put my hand in her shorts and
then started playing with her peanut.
then came the swim stop and the standard sea shag. splendid

Next the evictions

some irish lads arrived at a hotel in another part of the island on monday.
that night one of them burnt some union jacks and trashed his room. the
coppers arrived arrested all his mates who had´nt done a thing threw them in
prison for a night as the one who trashed the room legged it!!

the police caught him put him in prison for 2 days and fined them 280 quid!!
then the guy who did the trashing had to pay another 240 quid
for new accomodation as his mates were going to twat him!! All this occured
within 48 hours of them starting their 14 nights holiday

what else? oh yeah a timeshare suicide, a death threat, a few assaults, and
a massive fight between celtic and rangers supporters quite quiet at the mo,
as now its all older more boring people who are arriving
but worry not as the mail will be more upbeat as i will be moving to a
ski resort for the winter .

In the meantime as soon as i hear about it on GC so will you.

regards chris

the weather is still red hot here in g.c, however the fanny tally has
dropped to below unacceptable levels at the moment. It all seems to be
couples or if we do get groups of girls their all students who bring their
own food!!, and are more interested in island coach tours than booze
cruises.

In fact speaking of the booze cruise, i got a bollocking last friday as
when i got off the boat i was more pissed than any of the guests!! So as you
can see although the d.c´s are no longer here the spirit lives on.

we have had a good bunch of lads in though, one got pissed and fell from his
balcony (luckily only on the second floor) but his fall was broken by a.....
CACTUS!!! so for the rest of the holiday and probably
his life he was known as CJ (cactus jack)

anyway more gossip and info in my next report

signing off your overseas correspondant